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    <title><![CDATA[Jokes - ArcaMax Publishing]]></title>
	<link>https://www.arcamax.com//entertainment/humor/jokes/rss</link>
	<description><![CDATA[Jokes News Feed]]></description>
	<language>en-us</language>
	<copyright>Copyright 2026 ArcaMax Publishing</copyright>
	
	
	
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		<title><![CDATA[Politician's Sandwich]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[On the Listening Tour, a prominent politician was pleased and proud that the local sandwich shop in a town he was visiting had named a sandwich after him. He was somewhat less pleased after he found out what was in it. "Mostly baloney," said the ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-1223836</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/27/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Anniversary Gift]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[For their anniversary, a couple went out for a romantic dinner. Their teenage daughters said they would fix a dessert and leave it waiting.

When they got home, they saw that the dining room table was beautifully set with china, crystal and ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-1223835</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/27/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Three Doors]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[A rather bad man dies and meets Satan in a room with three doors.

Satan explains, "I have good news and bad news.  The bad news is that you
have to spend eternity behind one of these doors.  But, the good news is
that you can take a peek behind ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-84798</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/27/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Big Ad Account]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[During a Papal audience, a businessman approached the Pope and made this offer: Change the last line of the Lord's prayer from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken" and KFC will donate 10 million dollars to ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-84796</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/27/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Quick Funnies]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can 
do him absolutely no good." 

--Samuel Johnson, lexicographer (1709-1784) 

---

Some people are like slinkies... not really good for anything, 
but it's still fun to watch them tumble ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-16056</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/27/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Time Honored Truths]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk about other people.

To be intoxicated is to feel sophisticated but not be able to say ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-1223193</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/26/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[The Deep Hole]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[These two guys out hunting find a hole in the woods that's about three feet 
across, but it's so deep that when they drop a rock, they hear no sound. So 
they drop a bigger rock, but they still hear nothing.

So they go looking for something ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-971269</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/26/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[The Rules of Chocolate]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[- If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too 
slowly.

- Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all 
count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

- The problem: How to get 2 pounds of ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-971268</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/26/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[How To Know You're  Ready For Parenthood]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[<b>MESS TEST: </b>
Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet 
flower bed and rub on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Place a 
fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

<b>TOY TEST: </b>
...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-971266</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/26/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Statistician's Answering Machine]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[Hello, this is probably 438-9012, yes, the house of the famous statistician. I'm probably not at home, or not wanting to answer the phone, most probably the latter, according to my latest calculations. Supposing that the universe doesn't end in ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-84802</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/26/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Performance Reviews, part 8]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[... continued from above

"If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."

"If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the oceans."

"It's hard to believe that he beat 1,000,000 other sperm to the egg."

"One neuron short of a ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-1413178</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/25/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Performance Reviews, part 3]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[... continued from above

"He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."

"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."

"This employee should go far... and the sooner he starts, the better."

"Got a ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-1412600</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/25/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Texan With a New Car]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse. "I know that smart aleck 
Tex," said the first. "He's going to start bragging about that new foreign 
car he bought as soon as he gets back."

"Not Tex," the second cowboy replied. "He'll always be ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-970855</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/25/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Classwork]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man 
is nothing" on the blackboard and directed his students to 
punctuate it correctly. 

The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing." 

The women wrote: "Woman: Without her, man is...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-15959</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/25/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Real Teachers]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[
Real teachers buy Excedrin and 
Advil in bulk at Sam's. 

Real teachers will eat anything left in 
the teacher's lounge. 

Real teachers grade papers 
in the car, during commercials, 
in faculty meetings, in the bathroom, 
and at the end of nine ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-15871</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/25/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Feline Jury]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[Why did the judge dismiss the entire jury made up of cats?

Because each of them was guilty of purrjury.
<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-248436</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/24/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Frog Population]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[A noted biologist, who had been studying little green frogs in a swamp, was stumped. The frog population, despite efforts at predator control, was declining at an alarming rate.

A chemist at a nearby college came up with a solution: The frogs, ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-248435</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/24/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Build a Road the Army Way]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[One of my first jobs as a new Army lieutenant in Vietnam was to build a road across a rice paddy. Progress was slow because the paddy devoured most of the dirt we laid down. My superior officer, a major, appeared one day, determined to speed ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-248434</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/24/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[More Miscellaneous Terms]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MYTH: A female moth.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON: A bunch of ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-83928</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/24/2026</pubDate>
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		<title><![CDATA[Banking]]></title>
		<description><![CDATA[A young college girl came running in tears to her father. 
"Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!" she 
cried. 

"I did? What did I tell you?" said the dad. 

"You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that 
big bank is in ...<br /><br /><hr size="1" />]]></description>
		<link>https://www.arcamax.com/jokes/s-15623</link>
		
 
    <pubDate>Oct/24/2026</pubDate>
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