ArcaMax

Dear Eric: A few years ago, my 24-year-old child came out as nonbinary and chose a new name, “Avery.” While the adjustment hasn’t always been easy, most of our immediate family now use Avery’s new name and pronouns. The exception is my husband’s parents, especially my father-in-law, who does not accept Avery’s identity and has ...Read more

Dear Eric: A year and a half ago, I moved in with my mother. It was her idea, as I was having financial and health difficulties. I resisted at first, but eventually it became my only option.

My life situation improved for a while, but I recently resigned from a stressful job at her urging. I am close to retirement age and have had difficulty ...Read more

Dear Eric: I had a casual friend, Casey, in high school but didn't reconnect until a few years ago. She is driving me crazy with her relentless, impossible to answer questions, as well as her predicting and assuming what my family members will do or say in any given circumstance, despite never meeting them.

At one point, when I had surgery, she...Read more

Dear Eric: My 93-year-old Dad passed away recently, and my brother and I are planning a memorial service. Our mother died several years ago. Mom and Dad stayed married despite the fact that Dad came out as gay around 2000. He had a very close relationship with a man, “Douglas,” for many years, although they were just friends when Dad died.

...Read more

Dear Eric: After two decades working in the same organization and several years in my actual position, I've been wanting a change. I actually like my job but now in my mid-40s feel like I need to change things up for the second half of my career.

Between my wife's income and some savings, we could get by financially for a while.

I've resigned ...Read more

Dear Eric: Yesterday a cousin sent me a photo of a group of family members taken the morning after my father's funeral about 30 years ago. It included my mother, two sisters, an uncle, my brother-in-law and me. Most of us were still in our nightclothes, as it was taken early in the morning before other relatives left to return home.

With the ...Read more

Dear Eric: My spouse is unable to say "Oops, sorry." He automatically denies having done the thing or blames me or my son – even if he literally just did it in front of me/us.

It's been an issue for decades. We first went to counseling because he left a shower head pointing at a weird angle, so water got all over the wall and floor when I ...Read more

Dear Eric: On Mother's Day I received a voicemail, on my cellphone, from my sister-in-law. It evidently was a butt call that recorded my brother, sister-in-law and two of their friends having a good time drinking and bad-mouthing me.

In the voicemail my sister-in-law told their friends that her husband's sister "was a piece of work", to which ...Read more

Dear Eric: I met my wife about 20 years ago. Her three kids at the time were young to late teens.

The oldest, a daughter, has always been needy and played the victim. Over the years, we have given her a car; driven her to work before she got her license; gave her a living room set when she ran off and got married; drove three states away to ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am a 64-year-old woman who allowed my daughter (35) and son-in-law (34) to move in about two years ago. They committed to each other in 2022 but didn’t make a legal partnership. They have an open relationship.

He has pretty much always had a girlfriend. When I asked my daughter where her boyfriend was, she said she could have one...Read more

Dear Eric: I've been having problems with the noise coming from downstairs for more than three years now. I live in a two-family rental. Two much younger women live on the first floor.

One of them is completely rude about how much noise she makes. However, I didn't have a conversation with her about the noise. It took me three years, but I ...Read more

Dear Eric: My 21-year-old child responds only sporadically to texts and phone calls, often going days or weeks without a response. They live across the country with their other parent during the summers and holidays.

When I get the chance to see them face to face, which is once a year if I am lucky, it is as if no time has passed and has the ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have many friends who are religious, mostly devout Catholics and born-again Christians. I do not personally hold religious beliefs. Decades ago, I was deeply Christian, but my thinking has shifted to believe there is likely no God watching over us.

I do respect other people’s beliefs and would never try and push my point of view ...Read more

Dear Eric: My older sister, with whom I’ve never been close, is in her 80s and highly dysfunctional with money and life. She can’t make ends meet despite being a real estate agent and a substitute teacher.

I have “loan papers” she signed years back promising to pay me/us back, which never happened. Finally, I put a boundary on us to ...Read more

Dear Eric: Our married son and wife share all their plans, ideas, life experiences with her family and we hear nothing. We watch our grandkids, help them at a drop of a dime, we even spiff up the house when watching the kids and let their dogs out.

When we hear what they're doing or planning from her side of the family, we’ve had to stop ...Read more

Dear Eric: There is someone I have been friends with for more than 37 years. My husband and I moved to another state 12 years ago, but my friendship with this person has endured.

She calls every weekday and we mostly talk about her family and her kids, et cetera. About six months ago, she was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s.

For ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am a long-retired senior citizen. I manage my days by finding things to do. In the evenings, I generally go out to a handful of local establishments. Being single I sit at the bar to dine and have a cocktail. I am friendly and chat with just about anyone

At one establishment, I run into a lady from time to time. She is married but ...Read more

Dear Eric: My wife and I, both seniors, have similar views, but get our news from different sources. I read online and listen to podcasts while doing mindless tasks, at the gym and on walks when she does not join me.

She is totally devoted to cable TV and prefers me to not interrupt; I can do better and am trying.

She feels my podcast ...Read more

Dear Eric: My daughter recently committed to a university across the country, and she is supposed to start in the coming fall. She is only 17 and we think that she should be older before starting this new chapter of her life.

This among other reasons is why my husband and I have been increasingly hesitant to send her off to college this year ...Read more

Dear Eric: Last year my sister posted on Facebook that I was the result of an affair my mother had many years ago. It was with her first husband which ended in an annulment in 1941.The affair was in 1957.

Throughout my life I did feel that way. My father, mother and three siblings had blond hair. I had brown hair, now gray. My paternal ...Read more